In honor of this week’s theme of reflecting, during this time I have also been placed in a position where light is being shed on current matters that have been less than superb recently and how the present circumstances are all of a sudden turning into these very triggering events that I have been well advised in dealing with in the past. With that, old emotions are resurfacing during these new events which is forcing me to go inward to decide how I am going to respond whether that be different than how I have in the past, and what I am willing to allow into my energy at this stage in my journey. I’ve been with AEW since March 13th of this year, and I feel a lot of energies that are accumulating as certain people move about and the more interactions, we make backstage and throughout the weeks that need intense shadow work to be had. It brings me back to the personalities I dealt with in the past with WWE, where when they would win the upper hand against me, that loss and the treatment I received would get the better of me and in turn I would take all the bottled up resentment, anger, and frustration that I had at work back home with me, unleashing it in an unhealthy explosion of emotions. Not this time, not ever again, I refuse to allow myself to absorb or allow any negativity from others. If any of these negative energies cross my path, I transmute what I observe so that I leave everything at work with nothing attached to my consciousness that is not of my highest good. I set firm boundaries in what energy is acceptable and on top of that what energies I’m willing to be exposed to or how it affects those things and faces that otherwise do exist within AEW in a light that is pure and deserves to be reciprocated as such, because those are the ones that without knowing it are a part of the equation in what makes this place feel like one big family. I’ve had so much peace in my heart as of late and I’m at the point where nothing affects me, so real talk – I can’t be held responsible for anyone or anything that is divinely removed from around my life, what can’t be cleansed, won’t be kept and whatever that entail is beyond my control. Now when it comes to handling the PTSD on the family front, even though these last couple of months have been crazy with my mom and brother. I remain steadfast in my belief system and have not given in to any self-doubt about how I’m choosing to move forward in life or have a shed of worry in regards to what god is working on in the unknown areas of my life and as a result of this all-encompassing sense of faith, God has in return given me peace and placed on my heart the very strength I need to keep going. On top of that the strength of my support system, God has bestowed is proof of how much of these things are taken care of before I know of them. I can be strong and still seek help from God, who then serves up so many people to be the pillars of my foundation, never failing to help me with anything and everything in my family situation.
Last but most certainly not least, after having opened my heart space with you all here this week when it comes to my spiritual journey and the healing that comes with it, in dealing with trust, boundaries, and revelations of self. I want to hear from you what have been your victories since the last newsletter, and what #monématters are you working on in your journey that deserves to be celebrated. Send me a tweet with your answer, and let the collective continue to grow with love and light, Until next time!
